Most Nepali people you meet in and out of sajha dont' seem to be happy in the US. How many of you are actually happy in the US and how do you stay happy here?

Define happiness.
Having a job, being in status does not necessarily mean a person is happy and vice-versa. However, most of the people who seek help here in sajha forum have these two typical problems.

 A good paying job would help! and they need to be around good company!

A real happiness is when your inner heart is in peace, u r smiling without a reason and your heart dances even in pain. No emotion nor materials neither makes u sad nor happy. That heart is in peace. Going inward may help.

Love and Peace..

 Let's start with things I'm not happy with first:
- Parents are back home
- To-be-wife is back home
- School is stressful
- Haven't been able to do my best regarding school/physical activities
- Wish I had a car, not like I need it but would be nice
- Not so many Nepali friends, have good number of khaires though

Things I think I'm happy with:
- School's going great regardless of my 'not so much' devotion
- Economic status is pretty darn solid so far
- NO issues with work and visa
- Good contact with parents and friends back home
- Relationship, though long distance, is thriving
- Health is good, haven't been sick at all for long long time
- No bad habits like drugs/alcohol/smoking/randibaaji

Overall, I'm pretty happy despite the challenges and difficulties here in the States. There were some big sacfirices I had to make which still make me feel bad sometimes. Whenever I feel low, I reflect back on where I started and where I'm now. I feel like I've been able to do a lot of things; progress quite a lot since I've been here, despite those sacrifices and compromises. That keeps me going. Afterall, happiness is not something you find, it's something you make.

Great topic Grg_dai!

@janterei, sorry but your would-be wife could be ***king someone else out there.
She could be hoping to be here jumping on your back. :D  One out of thousands could-be chances.
I wish I'm wrong here but don't withhold yourself doing anything fun.
Just a  precautionary humble note., preparedness is better than regret.

I'm happy, I made this town my town. I'll settle down here sooner or later.

 bittertruth: it's not necessarily true that every one else's wife or girl friend sleeps with every other man like your does. and btw, be careful of what you write coz you don't know me or my to-be-wife. stop contemplating on my personal issues.

@ GrgDai

I think that the difference between what Nepalese speak, and the lives they truly live in America, brings a lot of conflict in their inner personal lives. And a person cannot be happy living in such conflict.

I find that a lot of Nepalese feel very defensive. They are struggling to find their identity. We come and live in America. And we are not completely sure about what the expectations are for us. We bring our mentallity of caste and creed from Nepal. We cannot fully drop this understanding and pretend that it is not there. But since it is considered racist to hold unto it, we cannot really adopt it either.

In many Nepali circles, Bahuns still feel comfortable with Bahuns. Newars still feel comfortable with Newars. We some how feel shy and uncomfortable to acknowledge this. So in many ways we end up playing cultural geurilla warfare because we practice what we cannot communicate in words. It is not socially acceptable to utter these words. So in many ways we live two lives. One life is the one we speak in Nepali circles. And the other is the one we practice but cannot put into words. So in this way we are conflicted.

So based on our identity of our caste, creed, family upbringing, gender, economic status etc, we have expectations accordingly about what it is that we should be doing and how. We are judged accordingly in our Nepali circle.

Many Nepalese feel defensive, I feel. That is why Nepalese have such short fuse.

Censored

@bittertruth all i can say ia goshh!!! im not here to change ur mind but how cud u define entire women of d world by jst dating few! n most importantly dun disrespect d ppl whom u dun evn know yet, thrs is better way to say if u really wanna educate(warn) d BOYS!!!

btw i dun xpect a better reply frm ppl whose thinkin a low level!!!! sickk
@jantare dai: goodluck wid ur to-be-wife :)

@ Bittertruth,

Doing that eventually u r hurting urself more than anybody.There will be a moment in your future u will be repenting on your guilt. Better u realize and enjoy your life upto the most without hurting somebody or their feelings.

After all u r a good man to be otherwise u wont accept what u doing. God bless u.

Love N Peace.....

@bittertruth you mutha[Disallowed String for - Bad word 'fuk']er jerko !!  there is definitely expression of freedom but dont get personal.  You just crossed the line right there. keep your stupid opinion with yourself.

Why dont you folks stick with the main intent of this email thread

 bittertruth, you indeed are bitter. that's just arrogant generalization. based on what you wrote, seems like you don't have a stable partner to love you. all you do is run after grils for sex and that's all you get, which obviously makes you think that every single girl out there is the same - like the ones you are boasting of having sex with. seems like you've never had a genuine relationship and you have no idea about it. so, better keep your mouth shut on this regard. even if you have one, you're still a disgusting womanizer having affairs behind your grilfriend's back. all you do is hide behind this nickname and yell things that please you without considering the effects on people. 

and by the way, thanks for your 'man-2-man' advice but no thanks, I don't need it. you better save it for yourself. it might serve you sometime in the near future since you seem to be quite suspicious about relationships and your partner. And please be respectful to all and be wary of your choice of words. Finally, be grateful that you didn't say those words in person to me.

thanks to everyone for enlightening the poor fellow.
bionerd: thanks! hope you're doing well. have fun back home!

@janterei, my intention was not to hurt you, I was just telling you ...for.. acceptance.. just dont run your life with straight-forward mind, possibilities in a good and bad ways are everywhere. you are here and she is there. this is the long distance scenario and consequences I was telling.. may be not all.. but I can't say.. anyways.. nothing personal.. take it easy...

@bionerd: we are damn conservative.. ain't we? I admit the use of my words went little overboard.. but, didn't mean to be disrespectful to jantarey..

@salala, that's why I"m into spirituality and meditation, just trying to recognize who really I am , purpose of my life and what am doing. The things that I did is sort of past things..

@no_more_crush:, I can understand your pain, but you didn't really need to compare me with the guy who banged your girlfriend. Be a man, cussing is not a solution.

@jantarei, yeh, will be careful next time about the use of my words. But didn't really mean to bring tsunami into someone's mind.

I'm a man and I dont want a fag like you to suck mah de-ek. focus on your spirituality-meditation, you pathetic psycho. I'm not cussing , am just kicking your brain-hormones.

no_more_crush , I can see how much brain do you have .. in other posts. you are undeniably a daft, that's for sure.. :D and once again, don't compare me with that banger.. lol.. :D 

so, you are unhappy now.. I think this survey is going great. but I'm happy. ummmm

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